"Bad Time Management Theatre" presents...

>NAME GET!

340 - Use BANDAGE, go EAST!

As a STRONG, INDEPENDENT WOMAN, you shake off your DAYDREAM and get down to business patching up your ARM (using your WICKED AWESOME HANDKERCHIEF).

JET: I'm glad I could help. Don't worry, I won't jump in front of any more knives any time soon.

IM (IMPRESSIVE MAN): Good ta hear.

You decide to head EAST and look around for M. BISON. He seems to have headed off on his own somewhere. Oh well, he can look out for himself. He's a freaking LIEUTENANT, after all! Strangely, you seem to have picked up CREWMAN #18 as a REPLACEMENT PARTY MEMBER since he's following you as you head out. Before you leave, the IMPRESSIVE MAN* glances over to you one more time.

IM (IMPRESSIVE MAN): By the by, lass. Ya seem ta be able to take care o' yerself, but here's a friendly word o' warnin'. Watch out fer two gents name o' Steelwood Corsair and Manbreath Threeplank. They're the right devils, lass.... Safe sailing.

You head EAST.

>Consider the CREWMAN

*On closer inspection, the Impressive Man's two-toned eyes come from the fact that his left eye (or right, if you're facing him) is pink, like a lot of blood vessels burst or he has pink-eye or something. Probably just another one of his many wounds.**

**Editor's note: FUN FACT! This links to a design evolution picture!

339 - Pirate Ship*

Originally, you were just developing a CRUSH on the IMPRESSIVE MAN, but frankly, this has turned into a much more developed M-M-M-MULTICRUSH, causing you to DAYDREAM about five possible PIRATE KING SHIPMATES. This is obviously more important than putting a BANDAGE on your ARM to prevent bleeding out.

>Use BANDAGE, go EAST

*It's a pun.

338 - Decide on a NON-INTERVENTIONIST COURSE OF ACTION

Well, you've been stabbed in the ARM. You shout for the PIRATES to get the NINJA and the two BEARDED CREWMEN fire their HANDCANNONS, miss (because he's a NINJA), and chase the ASSASSIN off down the STREET. Your "friend," the COFFEE-STAINED CREWMAN, loiters nearby, GUN drawn.

You pull the KUNAI out of your arm and check your previously unknown HIT POINT TOTAL. Yeah, losing one HIT POINT didn't put much of a dent in the total. Maybe a little dent in your ARM, but that should heal up.

The FUSE-BEARDED GIANT PIRATE seems torn between watching the continuing BATTLE across the RIVER and hunting down the FLEEING NINJA*. He glances down to your ARM.

IM (IMPRESSIVE MAN): If ye let that go, ye might find yerself with a pretty little scar, lass. A couple o' good scars let people know yer nothin' to be trifled with.

He pauses, staring across the RIVER.

 

IM (IMPRESSIVE MAN): Ya have me thanks for taking that knife 'stead of my back, but that was a da'fool thin' ta do and I'd ask ya not ta repeat it.

>Pirate Ship

*Were he to chase down the ninja, the large pirate would most likely plan to palm the ninja's head with one of his massive hands and squeeze it like a melon until it burst, all the while stabbing his razor sharp (but strictly utilitarian) sword deep into the purple scum's belly, then reveling in the destruction of another foe (one more enemy slain in a long list of those who dared oppose him). He'd most likely let that be a lesson. He's a harsh teach'r.

337 - Be... DEAD?

Um... no.

YOU GOT: STABBED IN THE ARM!

YOU LOST: ONE HIT POINT!

Well... that was anticlimactic.

>Decide on a NON-INTERVENTIONIST COURSE OF ACTION